FREE DOWNLOAD: TheInstantArtCritiquePhraseGenerator

Feeling inarticulate? Critically gauche? Or just verbally powerless? With the Instant Art Critique Phrase Generator, you need never again feel at a loss for commentary or “insights.”

Here’s how it works: Pick at random any five‐digit number, such as 80479, then read off phrase #8 of Table A, phrase #0 of Table B, and so on. The result is a CRAP (Critical Response to the Art Product) sentence. Add a few more five‐digit numbers to make a longer CRAP statement. After you have mastered the basic technique, you can realize the full potential of CRAP by arranging the phrases in DAECB order, BCEAD order, etc. Soon you can produce CRAP critiques as easily and fluently as anyone in your MFA program, or in the room for that matter!